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Dear MISSter Simms – Can Exes Be Roomies?


Can Exes Be Roomies?  Really?!

If you thought living with a stranger was bad, try living with your ex.

Dear MISSter Simms,

I am currently sharing an apartment with my ex-boyfriend.  Initially I thought it was a terrible idea, but he won me over when he showed me how it could benefit both of us financially.  I said we could try it out and see how things went.  Well, it’s been a month, and something has come to my attention that really bothers me.  He accidentally sent me an email under a fake email account he uses.  The odd thing was, the alias for this account was female.  When I confronted him about it, he claimed it was for junk emails.  I said, “…that’s creepy.”  I’ve got an email account I created specifically for junk emails too, but I’m not pretending to be a guy on it.  He responded by deleting his female account and creating one with a male name.  One of the reasons we broke up was because of his secretiveness and deceptive nature, so am I wrong to find this whole chain of events incredibly weird and to wonder what else he may be hiding?  Am I wrong for thinking we could work as roommates?  Should I even care?  Any help would be appreciated!

Suspicious Roomie

Dear Suspicious Roomie,

Are you wrong for thinking you and your ex could be roommates?  The short answer would be, “yes”.  The long answer: “Does the Pope poop in the woods?”  Living with someone in and of itself is a challenge.  Your roommate might like to cook in their birthday suit.  You might find that unhygienic.  Your roommate might like to listen to Swedish death metal.  You might like the smooth stylings of Hootie and the Blowfish.  Add the baggage that comes along with a broken relationship and you’ve got a recipe for disaster.  If he was just your roommate, you wouldn’t be writing me this letter.  But because he’s your ex first and foremost, there’s subtext to his actions.  Basically you’re still analyzing what he does as if he were your boyfriend when, in fact, that is no longer the case.

I can get why you would live with your ex.  He’s someone you know and trust slightly more than a random stranger (maybe?).  But you also think he’s shady and are already wondering what else he mad be hiding. What’s the point of living with him if it’s just going to drive you crazy?  So you can save money?  So you don’t have to think about looking for a new apartment and roommate?  It’s not worth it.  For the sake of your sanity and any future relationships you may have, hit up Craigslist and find a new place ASAP.

Need relationship advice?  Send your questions over to ronsimmsjr at gmail dot com.

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