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Ball & Chain Kind of Love

Love Crimes Of Kabul is an engaging documentary that allows you into the life of three women that are in a Kabul prison. We witness their interaction with inmates and family as they await trial and verdicts – not only legal, but also in love.

Love being the culprit for most of the crimes is a sorry ally when trying to win in court. I had quite a tug-of-war between heart and mind while watching this movie. I’m a romantic, but knowing that love never loves you, I also believe in being practical and realistic. Relationships take more than butterflies and smiles.

Love is, however, a beautiful experience; to think that people are punished for feeling such a human emotion saddens me a little. I would love to believe that these restrictions help lessen some of the issues that plague our society – teen pregnancy, divorce, lack of family union – but they don’t. It brings with it a whole wave of added disturbances. People don’t stop making human decisions – and yes, that includes mistakes.

What struck me most was the lack of conviction these women had. Whether they believed what they did was a crime or not, the air of doubt was thick in their choices. You could sense that they knew that they were there paying for something, but couldn’t quite put their finger on what it was. Sure they could recite the law that was broken, but they couldn’t tell you why it was wrong. In most of the cases shown, both men and women were incarcerated. However, the men were treated like misbehaved children who were scolded, while the women were talked to and treated like real criminals.

I’m not knocking the moral standings of a country or religion; however, I do feel that people should be given the freedom to decide what is right for them. The disparity between the choices and freedoms offered to men and women is immense. I don’t think that men and women are the same; we are not. But our differences in no way make one gender inferior to the other.

The regulations set on these women push them to extremes and only force them to take brash actions to try to get what seems like a positive outcome. One of the girls turned herself and the guy in because she had been involved with him and was scared he wouldn’t marry her. When society instills in you the fear of being outcast to the point that you are willing to submit yourself to imprisonment to avoid “shame,” there is a need to reevaluate. To top that situation, in the footage with her family, shame was mentioned maybe once. What was brought up repeatedly was money and how she had ruined the possibility of getting anywhere financially.

I understand that if I lived within the same circumstance, my point of view may be different and our “liberties” may seem to be outrages.  However, from where I stand I cannot help but feel that there is a great injustice being done. I have made my share of bad decisions, a couple that disappointed my father and others that angered my mother, but they were mine and I am thankful for them; I have learned and grown. I know better and hence do better. I would never want that taken away. Would you?

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