Dear MISSter Simms,
Hopefully you can help me out with this problem because it’s been eating away at me for a long time. I’m 24 years old and have been dating my boyfriend for almost two years now. Everything was great when we first started going out, and mostly still is. He’s thoughtful, a gentleman, and always great fun to be around. However, there’s one huge problem in our relationship and that is my boyfriend’s ex girlfriend.
Not too long into our relationship his ex started talking to me via Facebook. How she found out who I am nobody knows…Anyway, she said that my boyfriend was still talking to her and wanted to be with her, and that they were going to be together soon. My boyfriend just dismissed her as crazy and said she tried to ruin every relationships he’s been in since her, so I tried to put it at the back of my mind. But every couple of months or so she’ll send me another message saying how he’s a cheater and that I need to back off from her man.
I love my boyfriend but it’s becoming harder and harder to figure out what’s real and what’s not. I don’t have any evidence that prove my bofriend’s ex right, but I’m becoming more and more suspicious with each message I read. I don’t know what to do, and I don’t want to look like a fool if my boyfriend really is a dog.
Lost and Really Confused
First of all your boyfriend sucks. Not because of any cheating he mar or may not have done, but because he hasn’t nipped this in the bud by now. You guys have been dating for almost two years now and you’re still getting harassed? Denying the accusations is all fine and dandy, but your boyfriend should be doing his best to make this chick go away. I’m sure this constant stream of harassment can’t be good for your peace of mind or the relationship as a whole.
Second, this chick sounds crazy as hell, but I think there’s a method to her madness. My instinct tells me that your boyfriend may have actually been a cheater at one point and cheated on this girl. And now, to keep him from being happy ever, she’s taken to harassing you. Clearly her motive is breaking you two up. Whether she wants him back is debatable, but that’s not the point. I think you really, REALLY, need to talk to your boyfriend and see what kind of relationship they had and why it ended. And tell him to be as honest as humanly possible. At the very least it should shed some light on the situation and hopefully ease your concerns.
Now if all that doesn’t work just dump the dude and keep it movin’. Seriously. You are still very young. The world is your oyster. Insert some other cliche phrase here. Unless you are madly in love with your boyfriend and can’t live life without him, there is no need to be putting up with all this drama and harassment.
Need relationship advice? Send your questions to ronsimmsjr at gmail dot com and you might be featured on the next installment of Ask MISSter Simms.
- Ask MISSter Simms: Torn Between Lovers
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- Ask MISSter Simms – His Ex-Girlfriend Is Getting In the Way
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- Ask MISSter Simms – My Boyfriend Wants to Hook Up With Other Women