I’ve been in a relationship for five years now and I love my boyfriend deeply. I’ve never cheated before but for some reason the urge is very strong to do so now. Why do I want to cheat on my boyfriend and….should I?
Thinking About It
I can tell you from experience that cheating is never, ever ever ever, OK. Even if you have the worst boyfriend on the planet, don’t cheat. For one thing it’ll ruin whatever trust may exist between the two of you should anything come to light. For another, unless your boyfriend is the most inattentive and disinterested dude on the planet when it comes to what you do, it’s really friggen’ hard to come up with lies all the time to explain your long absences. On top of all THAT, you’ll probably be branded a cheater the rest of your life, no matter what good things you may do afterwards. Even if you never cheat again in your life, you’ll be a cheater. Think about it like this. A guy may be a saint, save lives, perform miracles, raise people from the dead and reunite loved ones or something….but if that same guy boinked a pig, what would you really remember him for? Yeah, cheating is totally like that.
Anyway, I can think of quite a few reasons why you’d even want to cheat in the first place Think of them as like the five deadly sins of cheating or something:
REVENGE – Did he already cheat on you? Does he dog you in front of his friends? Is he always eye boinking every woman that walks by? They say revenge is a dish best served cold, but it could be best served in a bed with another body on top of you.
COWARDICE – Maybe instead of cheating, you actually want to break up with the dude. But you’re too scared to do that….so you what do you do? Cheat on him! That way he’ll break up with you instead and you won’t have to bother with fixing the things that are wrong in your relationship.
BOREDOM – Sex can be pretty awesome, but not if the only thing you do is plain ole missionary every single night with zero fan-fare. Maybe you wanna wild out and get your Jenna Haze on, but he’s more Dashboard Confessional and wants to weep while gently holding you. Bet that bad ass, leather jacket wearing street pharmacist you saw at the mall the other day is looking really good right about now.
NEGLECT – Things were all good…until your boyfriend started working late shifts. And then he was too tired when he got home to call you. And then he was too busy on weekends hanging with his boys. And then he stopped having time to send flowers and take you out to the Cheesecake Factory. You still treat him like a prince, but he can’t be bothered to treat you like anything better than a serving wench. That’s a good recipe to start seeking attention elsewhere.
SELF ESTEEM – Does your boyfriend not make you feel sexy enough? Smart enough? Good enough? Are there other people flattering you 24/7 and talking about how much they wanna get in your pants? That could make you feel more beautiful and more loved, something your boyfriend may not be handling himself.
What you need to do is find out which of these applies to your situation and speak to your boyfriend about the situation. Communication is key to all relationships, especially the more intimate ones.
Need relationship advice? Send your questions over to ronsimmsjr at gmail dot com.
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