There’s something about fancy china plates and pretty porcelain figurines that makes me feel decidedly naughty. Maybe it’s because as a kid, I was mesmerized by my Grandmother’s porcelain tea set (which of course, I was never allowed to touch). Or maybe it’s because I like to imagine there’s something much more sinister lurking inside these mundane objects… Either way, it has only served to fuel my obsession with naughty porcelain.
Banksy obviously knows what I’m talking about. His exhibition at the Bristol Museum was filled with lots of surprises, but perhaps the most thrilling of his works were the seemingly-innocent objects hidden amongst antique porcelain in the museum’s rows of the glass cabinets.
And then there’s the always controversial ‘disasterware’ by Charles Krafft. Krafft fashions grenades, machine guns, skateboards and all kinds of other curios out of traditional Delftware (the famed Dutch blue-and-white china). Who needs real firearms when you can hang one of these above the fireplace?
Chinese artist Lei Xue juxtaposes priceless Chinese ceramics with everyday things we throw away. Of course, these crumpled soda cans must be some kind of ancient Chinese beer.
Stephen Johnson‘s reworked antique figurines are meant to say something about value-less objects – but it seems like the more he does with them, the more valuable they become. His glossy metallic bows only serve to make his figures more beautiful than they ever were.
Without doubt, the work of Yvonne Lee Shultz would definitely make ‘The Godfather’ want to have a tea party. Her pretty porcelain pistols would even melt the heart of the hardest tough guy’s Grandma.
Even naughtier still is this saucy souvenir you-know-what for the ladies, designed by Studio Oooms. Inspired by Dutch artist Johannes Vermeer’s innocent painting “Het Melkmeisje”, this Delftblue ceramic dildo will certainly be a talking point if you leave it out on your mantelpiece!
But if you’d like a piece of your own naughty porcelain, check out the work of New Zealand artist Trixie Delicious. Her range of cheeky china is available via Etsy – but be warned: some of her curse-word crockery might shock. Take caution when serving your Granny her tea!
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