I recently saw the Sex and the City 2 movie, and while I won’t be passing judgment on the film or spoiling anything here, I will say, it got me thinking. With the characters a couple years older, their lives a bit different, and relationships in new places, I started thinking about my own relationships (or the space for them).
The 4 characters of SATC were last seen as: single, just married, married with child, and married with child + new child. So, the gals have grown up. This is funny for me to notice and say since at this point, the characters are in their 40s and 50s. But to me, at some point I got it in my head that I would “grow up” and settle down in my 30s, and that was later than a lot of peers were thinking/have done. I think it is fantastic the characters are at these stages in life at their ages, but since I see so much of myself in the characters of the series, my preconceived notions expect them to be younger. However, here they are, on the big screen, living fabulously, putting together life, career, love, and family, and they have over 10 years on me.
So what’s the deal? Is 40 the new 30? 30 the new 20? Was my grown up plan severely mistaken? Are these ladies reflecting reality or making a statement on expectations and women’s age? I understand this is a movie and not real life, but something is at the heart of this and I’m curious what it is.
For me, I’m at a point where I’m trying to get my love life and life partner area dialed. I don’t expect to be swept off my feet and married next year, but I figure I ought to get out there now so I don’t wake up one day and realize I’m a long ways from any love I hope for. So sometimes, I push myself to date. I understand you can’t force these things and what will happen will happen and it’s all about timing. Still, if I didn’t make a solid effort to online date and make appearances at social events, I would likely be on a path not including a romantic partner. Which may be okay; knowing my habits I would be relatively isolated, super productive, relaxed, and may end up with my bodega guy. I’m not pressed about having a relationship right this minute, but I know it’s not my heart’s desire to never be in one. The idea of romance and love is steady blinking on my radar because someday I would like to have a life outside work and share that with somebody, and I know those things don’t blossom overnight. So, I’m on myself to put in the efforts now before I turn into a Cathy cartoon.
I mention this because here I am, inwardly stressing about my romantic future, and sometimes going on dates with people I’m not that into because I know I want something down the line. But on screen, here are these ladies who pull together their love stories, but only past their 20s, and even past their 30s. So I wonder: do I have 15 years to get this love game locked? Is the movie false assurance for grown women? Or is it it commentary on what children now will be shaping their grown plans on and what’s next?
Let me know what you think.
Image Layouts: Margaret
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