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Magdalene Ayuk
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Little Miss Frustrated:on that l.o.v.e

Little Miss Frustrated: what's up with this feeling!

Little Miss Frustrated: what's up with this feeling!

Now I don’t want the first thorough personal impression of me on this site to be that of a love sick puppy, but I must admit that “love” or in my case lack thereof is on my mind. Although, it’s buried by school, writing and organizing events, it’s still hidden in the remotest part of my brain. It happened this Christmas. “It” refers to the hammering and ensuing throbbing of my heart, and as corny as that sounds, that is the way I felt. But trust me, I am way better than I was during the holidays; as in, no more watching The Game on YouTube wishing that I had a love like Melanie and Derwin…without the him cheating on her part and getting another woman pregnant…, and no more staying up at night and wondering what I did wrong. I am happy. But, it’s sunny outside, the time when all the couple’s come out of hibernation as it seems, and I’m back to walking down the city streets with a smoothie in my head all be my lonesome! Also at the tender age of 22, many people around me are getting engaged! I used to shake my head at young love birds jumping the broom, but now, I’m actually *gasp jealous. And jealousy will not mesh well with the look I have planned for this summer. I am truly happy for them though, my time to find my colloquial rib will come. In the meanwhile, I am keeping busy; I’m in the process of starting a non-profit organization towards the fight against HIV/AIDS and I’ve applied to teach sexual education full-time for 6 months in Botswana or Ghana.

Addendum: A couple of days ago, I went to my University gym and met a personal trainer. He approached me and then spent three hours at my side giving me pointers and helping me through tough exercises. It all seemed too good to be true, and I was more than a little skeptical. We share similar beliefs, he cooks, blatantly made known his interest in me, is funny, can do a killer Jamaican accent (since he’s from there originally), not to mention being ripped and quite handsome. Our encounter was actually quite romantic, but then the next day, he asked my good friend for her number whereas he had thrown the cheesy line saying he wanted to “show me what my ex couldn’t” the day before. I must say that this actually quite hilarious  situation chased away the love bug. Two days later as my body is still hurting from the intense workout; I am constantly reminded that relationships/dating can be just that, a pain.

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2 Responses to “Little Miss Frustrated:on that l.o.v.e”

  1. Jenessa says:

    my darling, and it doesn’t get any easier as you age. people said it to me and i wanted to punch them in the mouth, “when your not looking!” do your thing. remain a positive influence on your peoples and i promise something with land on your lap. it did for me! what you do from there is on you. so don’t stay bitter for too long! everyone is different.

  2. Magdalene Ayuk Magdalene says:

    Thanks Jenessa;) you’re right; bitterness is a waste of energy!


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